So, I've been thinking. Trying to get us out of this little funk we've got ourselves into. Things are going better. I honestly think, sometimes it's just finding a balance and keeping it. I find myself trying so hard to push the academics that I leave off the character building part of schooling. Obviously, when I slack in the area of enforcing respect, good behavior, manners, everything else goes haywire. Don't get me wrong education is important, but in order for my boys to be successful they need to be well rounded, meaning they need to know their manners, have respect for others, know how to be a true gentlemen. (The only daughter I'm getting is a future daughter in law, so I better make sure they pick a good one. Right?)
I was speaking to my hubby the other day, it seems boys now days are turning so "girly" or maybe feminine is the correct word. *eyeroll* now don't get me wrong I'm all for boys knowing how to show emotion, being caring and compassionate, but what I see lacking is real men. Men that are leaders of the home, providers, hard workers, tentative to their family and children, or Lord forbid they open a door for a lady, wash dishes, or (gasp) actually mow the lawn!
I came across this article in perfect timing, it sums up so much of how I feel right now.
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Don't you get it?
YOUR RAISING THE NEXT GENERATION OF MEN!
One of these days there is going to be some woman loving your son.. He is gonna need to know how to treat her. You better be showing him what it means to have CHARACTER!
To do the right thing at the right time..
To hold a job. To provide for his family. To be a parent to the children he spawns..
And to think that it will all suddenly happen when he needs it.. He will "learn as he goes" is Not gonna happen!
If you don't teach him who will?
I. MANHOOD IS NOT DETERMINED SOLELY BY PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS.
American folklore is full of stories of men who seemed larger than life. John Henry and Casey Jones - heroes of the railroad era. Paul Bunyan with his swinging ax. David Crockett and the Alamo, Daniel Boone and the Kentucky wilderness, and a host of western personalities - all big and strong and physically impressive.
But physical strength alone does not equal manhood.
In his classic novel, Of Mice and Men, John Steinbeck presents a character who has the body and the muscle tone of a man. In fact, he is an exceptionally strong man. But his mind is that of a child. He cannot think and he cannot grasp abstract and complex ideas. His physique alone does not qualify him for manhood.
II. MANHOOD IS NOT DETERMINED BY ONE'S STATUS IN LIFE.
A simple glance around and you know that all the rich, all the leaders, all the powerful and the important are not necessarily blessed with manhood. Some are thieves. Some are liars. Some are cheats. Some are cowards. Some are hypocrites. Some are adulterers.
Bernard Madoff, the former respected chairman of the NASDAQ Stock Exchange, bilked investors out of more than $50 billion and ushered in The Ponzi Economy. He lived like a king in series of billion dollar residences but today exists in the disgrace and bleakness of a prison cell, awaiting sentencing, at age 71.
Preachers and teachers and world leaders whose reputation was formerly impeccable, today live in the aftermath of the crime and shame of moral bankruptcy.
III. MANHOOD IS NOT THE SAME AS PARENTHOOD.
Parenthood can come within moments: manhood is a long, tedious process of growth. Parenthood can be the result of a simple, instinctive, biological act - without thought, or planning, or experience, or counting the cost. But manhood demands thorough application of all the mental processes and all the moral fiber one possesses.
IV. MANHOOD IS A STATE OF MATURITY WITH MARKED CHARACTERISTICS.
Manhood does not whine or whimper.
It does not make excuses for what it knows itself to be.
It does not rationalize.
It does not blame circumstances.
It does not blame other people or fate or bad luck or the roll of the dice.
It does not blame society, either (whatever that may mean).
Manhood does not quibble over the frivolous and the unimportant.
It does not dream away its days thinking of the uncharted future, nor does it become immobilized with shame for the unchangeable past.
Manhood puts away childish things. It develops attitudes of maturity toward itself, toward others, and toward the basic issues of life.
Manhood shoulders and carries without complaint the full sack of responsibilities associated with maturity. By its very nature, manhood requires the forgetting of self and the acceptance of others. Husbands are responsible for their wives. Fathers are responsible for their children.
Along with proper attitudes and a sense of responsibility, manhood is also characterized by action. A man must be able to act. Opportunities are like arrows upon the wind. They move swiftly. They appear only for a moment and then they are gone. They are not for philosophizing about, they are not for discussing, they are not always for evaluation and calculating.
Opportunities are for seizing. Opportunities are the challenge to manhood.
And only men – real men – are up to their speed and their promise.
The world needs men. The community needs men. The church needs men – real men.
Real manhood is a simple task carried through to completion;
the rendering of an honest day's work; the keeping of a trust;
the returning of love unselfishly and without demanding payback.
The rewards of real manhood are myriad - the touch of a child's hand;
the soft brush of a wife's lips;
the relaxed atmosphere of his own den; these are only a few of the rewards of manhood.
We need – we must have – more REAL MEN with guts and a backbone to take a stand in the midst of a gainsaying world
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I know I can't guarantee that my boys will turn into real men, but I can try my best to equip them while they're still young so maybe as adults they will hold tight to the instruction and values we have done our best to teach them.
